vendredi 24 février 2017

I wanna post.
I wanna post but it's 2:56 I am having an insomnia, I don't wanna turn on the lights not to awake the fiancé. I recently cleared my phone memory so the only pix I have in there are dogs' and they didn't fit my current mood.
I wanna post because I am having insomnia again.
I am slowly but surely coming back to the real world and with it, its share of stress.
Normal stress people would say : planning the big day, juggling with unexpected bills and savings expectations for the wedding...
What keeps me up at night ?
Planning tomorrow's day. A busy one. With time frame to respect.
I keep seeing it as stuck in a loop, constantly being poked by unwanted thoughts... some useful  (don't forget to take the business cards) but turning into an obsession  (you have to remember to take the business cards do you hear me ? ???? Remember !  Remember ! !!!!@)... some definitely not helping (there's no way that you will be able to do all you got to do in 2 hours! No way! And it's gonna rain anyway! Your hair is gonna be ruined ! )...
......
Now that I'm running free in the wilderness of the world I find it hard to not be dragged by the hord... to still find a moment to stop and seat... to listen to my body.
Don't wanna be dragged down again,  but still run far behind...
...
#whatmentalillnessfeelslike #anxiety #anxietydisorder #mentalillness #mentaldisorder #insomnia #nightsthoughts